When You’re Both Grandparent and Caregiver, Why Water Aerobics May Be the Ideal Senior Workout, and a Guide to Medicare Enrollment

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History (Non-Fiction): Augustus: First Emperor of Rome by Adrian Goldsworthy – This compelling biography traces how Augustus transformed himself from Caesar’s young heir into Rome’s first emperor.

Memoir: A Fortunate Life by A.B. Facey – A.B. Facey recounts a remarkable Australian life shaped by hardship, war, family, perseverance, and an enduring sense of gratitude.

Self-Help: The Dip by Seth Godin – Seth Godin explains how to recognize when perseverance will pay off—and when quitting is the smarter path forward.

Romance: When in Rome by Sarah Adams – A burned-out pop star escapes to a small town and finds an unexpected connection with the guarded man who takes her in.

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For many families, grandparents are much more involved than occasional visits and holiday gatherings. Some provide after-school care several days a week. Others help during school breaks, summer vacations, or before and after work. Others are even involved in daily caregiving for years at a time.

While these arrangements can be deeply rewarding, they also create a unique challenge: How do you remain a grandparent while also being responsible for routines, rules, and discipline?

One of the first things many caregiving grandparents discover is that the traditional "grandparent role" changes when you're involved in daily life.

When you're helping with homework, enforcing bedtime, limiting screen time, or reminding children to finish their chores, you're participating in responsibilities that occasional grandparents rarely face, embodying a role somewhere between traditional grandparent and traditional parent.

That doesn't mean the relationship becomes any less special. It simply becomes broader. Children begin seeing you not only as a source of fun and affection, but also as a caregiver, a disciplinarian, and someone they can depend on.

Children generally benefit when expectations remain predictable across households, no matter who is in charge.

Whenever possible, it helps when grandparents and parents communicate about how to manage routines, household rules, screen-time expectations, homework responsibilities, and consequences for certain behaviors.

Consistency often reduces conflict for everyone involved.

When caregiving becomes part of daily life, it's easy for the relationship to revolve entirely around logistics:

That's why it can be helpful to intentionally preserve a few traditions that belong specifically to the grandparent-grandchild relationship, in whatever form that might take:

Small rituals help maintain the feeling that your relationship is about more than supervision.

Many grandparents worry that enforcing rules will damage their relationships, that authority and intimacy are diametrically opposed. In reality, children are often capable of understanding that the people who care for them also set limits—indeed, they can sometimes come to appreciate the predictability of established rules.

The key is making sure correction isn't the primary way you interact. If most conversations sound like “Don’t forget …,” “Please stop …,” or “You need to …,” then the relationship can start feeling defined or burdened by correction and management. 

A balance must be struck: While correction is part of every child’s life, they must also experience conversation, laughter, encouragement, and shared activities that help keep the connection strong and remind them of the love and care underpinning the relationship.

Sometimes caregiving grandparents feel pressured to handle everything perfectly. But part of what makes grandparents special is that they bring something different than parents: perspective.

Grandparents have already gone through the parenting journey. That experience is invaluable, as is their general life experience. Sometimes that can be a crucial component of the grandparent-grandchild connection: Who has more stories than Grandma or Grandpa? 

Still, it’s crucial not to turn every moment into a lesson or every problem into a teaching opportunity. Sometimes being the person who listens, shares family history, or simply sits and talks is enough.

Children will almost certainly not remember every rule you enforced or every reminder you gave. What does stay with them is the feeling of being welcomed, cared for, and known.

Years later, they are likely to remember small moments that revealed large connections:

While day-to-day responsibilities might dominate a grandparent’s mental load, they don’t have to dominate the relationship itself.

Being both a grandparent and a caregiver requires balancing affection with responsibility and fun with structure. While that role can sometimes be demanding, it also creates opportunities for connection that many grandparents never experience.

Children who spend significant time with grandparents often gain something invaluable: another trusted adult who knows them deeply, shows up consistently, and becomes part of the fabric of everyday life.

We're looking for seniors who are embracing life with enthusiasm, purpose, and adventure. Whether you're traveling the world, starting a business, volunteering, pursuing a passion, learning new skills, or simply making the most of every day, we'd love to hear your story.

Think that might be you?

Email [email protected] with a photo and a short bio. We may feature you in an upcoming edition of Seniors Magazine.

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Replacing the Pen Before It Runs Out
From the life overview of Eleanor R., 75, Madison, Wisconsin. Shared with permission.

I have a habit of replacing a pen before it has completely run out of ink.

Not every time, though, and not because it has stopped working. Usually it begins with a slight hesitation in the line I just wrote, a word that comes out lighter than the one before it, or a small scratchiness that wasn't there the week before. The pen is still perfectly usable, but I've learned not to wait for the moment it fails entirely.

When I was younger, I thought that was wasteful. I thought a pen should be used until it had absolutely nothing left to give. Throwing one away while it could still produce a sentence felt like quitting too early.

These days, I think about it differently.

There's a difference between something functioning and something functioning well. If I'm writing a birthday card, taking notes during a meeting, or signing a document, I'd rather not wonder whether the next line will appear as intended. Easing that small uncertainty is worth more to me than the last few drops of ink.

I don't discard the old pen immediately. It usually ends up in a drawer where it finishes its life labeling boxes or scribbling reminders on scrap paper. It still has work to do—just different work.

I've come to appreciate that not every object has to be pushed to its absolute limit to have been fully used.

***

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Internet Sacred Text Archive
This enormous online library collects historical writings on mythology, folklore, philosophy, religion, legends, and traditional beliefs from cultures around the world. You might begin with Greek mythology and end up reading Hawaiian legends or nineteenth-century collections of Appalachian folklore. It’s the kind of wonderfully rabbit-hole-prone website where curiosity gets to choose what comes next.

Police warn seniors a fake Microsoft pop-up can end in a gold bar scam

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A vintage postcard can hold an extraordinary amount of history in just a few inches of paper. The picture might show a long-gone hotel, a bustling Main Street, or a vacation destination before highways changed the landscape. Turn it over, and you may find an equally fascinating glimpse of everyday life in a handwritten message.

Postcard collecting is easier when you give yourself a theme. You might look for cards from your hometown, places you've traveled, national parks, old roadside attractions, holidays, trains, or historic buildings.

Before buying, explore the Newberry Library's postcard collections to learn more about postcards as historical objects. The New York Public Library Digital Collections are also worth searching for digitized postcards and other historic images.

Don't overlook the back. Postmarks can help date a card, while addresses, stamps, and handwritten notes add context. A message as ordinary as "Arrived Tuesday—the hotel is lovely" can become fascinating a century later.

If you're researching a place mentioned on a card, Chronicling America provides access to historic American newspapers. Searching the town, hotel, business, or person's name may reveal more of the story.

Age alone doesn't make a postcard valuable. Condition, rarity, subject matter, photographer or publisher, and demand all matter. The Smithsonian Institution Archives' postcard collection is a useful resource for exploring how historic postcards document people, places, buildings, and events, while also giving you examples to compare with your own finds.

When shopping online, eBay's postcard listings can give you an idea of what's available, but compare several listings rather than assuming an asking price reflects a card's actual value.

Store postcards away from direct sunlight and moisture, preferably in archival-quality, acid-free sleeves or albums. Avoid writing directly on older cards or attaching them with tape or glue.

A good postcard collection doesn't have to be valuable in dollars. Its real appeal is discovery: each card preserves a tiny piece of a place, a journey, and sometimes an ordinary person's life that might otherwise have disappeared.

Scammers often ask for payment by gift card or wire transfer because the money can be difficult—or impossible—to recover once it is sent. The request may appear to come from a relative, government agency, utility company, bank, or even someone you know.

Be suspicious if someone insists you must act immediately or face an arrest, shutoff, financial penalty, or other emergency. Another major warning sign is being told to buy gift cards and provide the card numbers or PINs by phone, text, or email.

Government agencies and legitimate businesses generally won't demand payment with retail gift cards. Be equally cautious if someone unexpectedly asks you to wire money, especially to an unfamiliar person or account.

Don't rely on the phone number, email address, or link provided in the suspicious message. Instead, contact the person or organization another way. If a relative supposedly needs emergency money, call them directly—or contact another family member who can verify the situation.

If you've already provided gift card information, contact the company that issued the card immediately. If you've initiated a wire transfer, contact your bank or transfer service as quickly as possible and ask whether the transaction can be stopped or recalled.

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